Going shopping is a lot like life.

When you go to the grocery store with a list and not hungry you walk in get what you’re looking for and walk out. There are no distractions like BOGO’s, snack’s or something else that may catch your eye.

If you’re brave and walk into the store unarmed without a list or even worse without a list and hungry, you will spend a lot of time in the store and walk out with 4 carts full of stuff you don’t need that just sounded good.

This is just one visit to the grocery store for JUST one week of food. After you get home and unpack everything you sit and look at the receipt, you think to yourself next time I will make a list and not be hungry so I get what I need.

Interesting how shopping c”art” imitates life.

Trying to find “the one”, a job or career path is like going out shopping without a list and most of the time we’re hungry and the results are the same.

You meet someone at a bar, online dating or work that is nice and you think, this is better than being alone. I ask is it?

I dated for a long time before I met my wife of 12 years. I was not armed with a grocery list of what I was looking for. Living in Chicago alone 678 miles from family and friends I just wanted anybody to connect with. I was dating somebody for about two years and I was not happy, she was not happy either I am sure. A friend called and asked me three great questions and it made me open my eyes that you should ask yourself. She asked me “do you love her” and I replied with a “yes”. She continued “are you in love with her”? I thought for a second and said “yes”. The third question is what opened my eyes “do you like her”? (Cue the crickets) “NO” I said, it was at that very moment I realized I had 4 shopping carts of stuff I didn’t want and broke it off. A week later she was out on a date, like I said she probably was not happy either. She is a great person just not the one for me.

A month later I called my friend and informed her I broke it off she than gave me great advice that I will share with you in a later blog that helped me find “the ONE’. She armed me with the shopping list and it made all the difference.

Job searching is the same way as shopping and dating without a list. If you’re like most people you graduate from a college or university with a piece of paper that cost a lot of money and you have a loan to pay off. This is what makes people searching for jobs throw away any list they may have had and makes them very hungry.

The weight of the loan drowns all the dreams of becoming an artist, journalist or history teacher.
Instead they just get any job so they can start paying off that loan. Ten years later and they stop and look around because they can finally come up for air and realized this is not the life they dreamed about. The good news is the school loan is a lot smaller but now there is a mortgage, married to someone and kids you have to feed.

The difference between shopping, finding love and finding a career is you can unload your cart before you check out. Great news is you can do the same with your life before you check out but it’s not going to be easy. If you stop and look around and you’re NOT where you want to be you can take small and consistent steps to get what you want in life. I am not saying to break up with the one you’re with or give your two weeks notice. What I am suggesting is sitting down and making a list of things you can do on a consistent basis to get where you want. People want to take a pill to lose weight, make millions or have six pack abs but there is no such thing.

You take a shower, brush your teeth and look at your phone everyday why not work on your true self everyday and unload one item from your cart one item at a time.

Do you know why we don’t go grocery shopping for the year? Some of the food will go bad, not all but some. The main reason is because in our mind we will think, how can I push that many carts, where would I even start, where will I put it all in the house and we wouldn’t even get started.

Don’t think about all the work you will have to do or where you will find the time, just make your list, start small and take constant steps. Who knows you might just find happieness.

STAY GENUINE!